After watching Pirates of the Caribbean II yesterday, I have a little prayer: God, can you please make me Keira Knightley in my next life? Thank you. (Although I just looked over the top of the computer monitor here at the Whetstone library and saw Orlando Bloom on one of those "Read" posters* and it freaked me out a little. So I don't know how well I'd do being Ms. Knightley if seeing Orlando Bloom unexpectedly tends to freak me out. I think if I were getting paid enough I could cope though.)
Oh, and yeah, I've actually bothered to go to the library and blog, so I suppose I should, er, blog. According to the library's timer, I have 55 minutes to do it so I guess I need to hustle.
First of all, congratulations to Jacklyn on her marriage and to Lynx on her return to grad school. Both are very cool, unlike the weather here just now. I swear I got sunburned inside Easton AMC yesterday and now getting actual sun just compounds the problem.
I do have a confession to make, however. I sort of like Easton. Yeah, I know that Satan and his minions live below it and all that. I know that the architecture makes Walt Disney World look like the Parthenon. I know that it's basically sucked all of the business off of Morse, making it an even nastier road to drive down than it already is (unless you like parking lots and Taco Bell). But I like the stores. I like Anthropologie and Bigelow and White Barn and L'Occitane and Francesca's and Barnes & Noble and Smith & Hawken and even, God help me, Hot Topic (because it's hilarious to walk in and have everyone turn to look at the obese normal-looking middle-aged woman who just walked in). And I don't even fit any of the clothes they sell in those stores (those stores that sell clothes... no, Barnes & Noble does not have a clothing line, at least not one they're showing me).
It's all wish-fulfillment, I guess. It's pretty much the deeply American part of myself that wants to be able to walk around Easton and watch fun movies and wander into a store and buy some happiness. In fact, I want everyone to be able to do it. I think that everyone, the richest of the rich and the poorest of the poor, deserve to have a big bucket of popcorn, a huge diet pop and two and a half hours of Johnny Depp acting like a drunken English aristocrat. And then they deserve to go shopping and buy soap and nice clothes (even the ones I'll never be able to wear).
Of course, the most American part of this little scenario is that it's not like it would solve anything, certainly not the question of why some people get to do these things so much they take them for granted, some get to do these things but not often enough to take them for granted, some will never get to do them, and some (including dear friends of mine) wouldn't do them for any reason. But maybe honesty counts for something. Maybe just praying to be Keira Knightley would be a better choice.
*Excuse my rant, but I know those are a nice sentiment and everything, but who believes that any of these celebrities read? OK, maybe Ani DiFranco, but seriously, Britney Spears? I see these posters with glamorous, or someone's idea of glamorous, celebrities on them and think that none of them, no matter who is on them, is going to convince anyone to read. Because none of those people got to be famous by reading! They got famous by being artistically creative, by being athletically talented, or by being sluts, but none of them got famous by being hyperliterate. I think it would be more honest to say to kids, "Look, your chances of ending up on the butt end of society increase exponentially if you can't bring yourself to crack open a book every once in a while because *you* might want to know what's inside, not because someone is making you do it." But that would make a crap poster.
Oh, and yeah, I've actually bothered to go to the library and blog, so I suppose I should, er, blog. According to the library's timer, I have 55 minutes to do it so I guess I need to hustle.
First of all, congratulations to Jacklyn on her marriage and to Lynx on her return to grad school. Both are very cool, unlike the weather here just now. I swear I got sunburned inside Easton AMC yesterday and now getting actual sun just compounds the problem.
I do have a confession to make, however. I sort of like Easton. Yeah, I know that Satan and his minions live below it and all that. I know that the architecture makes Walt Disney World look like the Parthenon. I know that it's basically sucked all of the business off of Morse, making it an even nastier road to drive down than it already is (unless you like parking lots and Taco Bell). But I like the stores. I like Anthropologie and Bigelow and White Barn and L'Occitane and Francesca's and Barnes & Noble and Smith & Hawken and even, God help me, Hot Topic (because it's hilarious to walk in and have everyone turn to look at the obese normal-looking middle-aged woman who just walked in). And I don't even fit any of the clothes they sell in those stores (those stores that sell clothes... no, Barnes & Noble does not have a clothing line, at least not one they're showing me).
It's all wish-fulfillment, I guess. It's pretty much the deeply American part of myself that wants to be able to walk around Easton and watch fun movies and wander into a store and buy some happiness. In fact, I want everyone to be able to do it. I think that everyone, the richest of the rich and the poorest of the poor, deserve to have a big bucket of popcorn, a huge diet pop and two and a half hours of Johnny Depp acting like a drunken English aristocrat. And then they deserve to go shopping and buy soap and nice clothes (even the ones I'll never be able to wear).
Of course, the most American part of this little scenario is that it's not like it would solve anything, certainly not the question of why some people get to do these things so much they take them for granted, some get to do these things but not often enough to take them for granted, some will never get to do them, and some (including dear friends of mine) wouldn't do them for any reason. But maybe honesty counts for something. Maybe just praying to be Keira Knightley would be a better choice.
*Excuse my rant, but I know those are a nice sentiment and everything, but who believes that any of these celebrities read? OK, maybe Ani DiFranco, but seriously, Britney Spears? I see these posters with glamorous, or someone's idea of glamorous, celebrities on them and think that none of them, no matter who is on them, is going to convince anyone to read. Because none of those people got to be famous by reading! They got famous by being artistically creative, by being athletically talented, or by being sluts, but none of them got famous by being hyperliterate. I think it would be more honest to say to kids, "Look, your chances of ending up on the butt end of society increase exponentially if you can't bring yourself to crack open a book every once in a while because *you* might want to know what's inside, not because someone is making you do it." But that would make a crap poster.
posted by The Surtsey Islander at 5:54 PM
1 Comments:
And by "sluts," I mean Emeril Lagasse and Bill Gates. Of course.
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